Sunday, April 24, 2011

It takes one person to forgive, it takes two people to be reunited :)


Hey people.
Nothing much to say tonight.
Just want to share how i felt sometimes.
And how does it works.
Forgiving people?
What did you guys think??

Some hurts are minor.
 Such as personal slights or embarrassing moments. 
In either case the reaction to the hurt is to sometimes say, "I will never forgive." 
But..
If we have then consider this question, "When we don’t forgive, who suffers?"
We often will think about the hurt if we not forgive.
 Sometimes events of the day will remind us. 
At that moment, we might see the person on the street and remember what they did.  
A song on the radio stirs the embers of the pain. 
Until one moment, we might work with the person or even live with them. 
Everyday we may be reminded of what happened.
Once reminded, we will start thinking about how bad it was. 
How, unfair. 
We are filled with anger and resentment, or sadness and loss.
At this point who is feeling bad? 
Who is miserable? 
"Us"

What is the other person doing? 
Most likely not busy thinking about us. 
They may not remember what happened or even know we were hurt. 
They may not care that we were hurt. 
They are feeling just fine.
Our lack of forgiveness is only hurting ourself. 
End up with miserable. 
But what would happen if we were to forgive? 
Who would get better? 
"Us"

I always remember this, "Forgiveness is always for you." 
I am not forgive for the other person. 
I forgive so I can get better.
 Forgiveness is a letting go.
 It is freeing of ourself.
But sometimes it is difficult because it can seem like "giving in" or being weak. 
We don’t want to be weak, so we don’t forgive.
It can seem like an approval of what happened. 
Right? 

But..
 Did we realise that by not forgiving and holding a resentment is like having a wound which we check everyday.
 To see if it is healing. 
Everyday we open it up to look and sure enough it is not any better. 
To heal from a wound we must stop checking on it everyday. 
To heal from hurt we must stop reliving it everyday people.
Remember, forgiveness frees us
It recaptures the energy that we giving away in sadness and anger. 
The forgiveness choice is, " Do we want to be bitter or better." 
Keep holding on to the pain and we will be bitter. 
We can make the better choice. 
Learn to let go and learn to be a forgiving person.

p/s :Spoken forgiving, no matter how heartfelt, works best when we do not demand the response we want. I mean that when we tell people we forgive them, we must leave them free to respond to our good news however they are inclined. If the response is not what we hoped for, we can go home and enjoy our own healing in private :) 



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